spanking

5:35pm in my room,
ready to head off campus
for some much-needed
time with the fiance.
phone rings.
"Did you remember
that you're supposed to work
the 5:30-11:00 shift?"

5:40pm running down the stairs,
books spilling out of arms,
on the cell phone
with fiance.
"I just found out.
I have to work.
Won't get to see you tonight.
I hate this."

5:50 at the desk,
pretending to smile
and hoping the my eyes
don't look too red.
thinking,
"i hate this,
i want to see Ben
i hate this,
i have laundry to do
i hate this."

6:30 behind the desk,
hearing a conversation
behind me,
"i'm going to try
really hard
to get my white glove
done tonight.
yes, i know it has to get done.
i'm going to try.
i will."

6:32 a glance over my shoulder.
it's the girl who lives
across from me.
her Daddy died
last weekend.

6:33 she's gone upstairs
to clean her room.

6:35 fiance. ben.
bringing me dinner
and offering to do my laundry

6:37
forgive me, Father.
i have sinned.