Aeneas pleads with the gods. He wants to journey into the underworld to be reunited with his father. He can do it. He is strong. He is Jove's son. But the prophetess answers,
"The way down to Avernus is easy.
But to retrace your steps and get back to upper air,
This is the real task and the real undertaking."
So easy to descend. So hard to come back. It's been running through my mind all morning. Easy down. Hard up. EasyHard. DownUp. GoCome. So easy to fall descend stray. We all do it in our own ways. But we call it introspection. We call it melancholy or deep thinking or discouragement or solitude or sometimes even prayer. But whatever its label, we let it cripple paralaze kill profitable action. Whatever we call it,
it is the choosing of our brains to take a journey inward.
A descent from our dwelling place in the shadow of His wings, an exploration of our inner beings, a journey to the searing coals of human reason. And we realize one day, today, that such journeys are easy. And such journeys are not right. We descend into ourselves to find the meaning answer reason cure. And find ourselves in Hell. It is no game we play, this dangerous introspection. And the return journey, the pilgrimage to the high offices of our priesthood, seems perilously impossible.
We are the Royal Priesthood. Why do we beg the lesser gods which are no gods to lead us into worlds that are but cages? Because we understand cages. In small confined spaces we can reign over dust, fragments of thought, unfinished projects, high ideals. Kings of nothing we'd rather be than own ourselves to be unskilled intermediaries of another Lord's invisible kingdom.
Indeed, the way up, the way back to wholesome air, the way out of material dankness and nothingness is Hard. But only for those of the mortal strain. For all our shunning and all our running, there is but one Fountain of Living waters. And His words are in our mouths. His very Godhead existing within our souls. We, you and I and all the Sons of God, have no such trouble unless we choose it. And the power to choose rightly is ours. We have Almighty. Creator pulsing in our veins. Why do we not choose Him now?
Why do we not choose to return to our Priesthood? To the place where we can proclaim to the nations: Our God Reigns! He reigns on Terra! He rules the sky! He rules in the hearts of men! What you live in now is but a painting, what you touch but a sculpture, what you hear but a symphony, what you do but a part in a play. Oh, come with us and meet the Artist. Meet the LoverSaviourConqueror.
Let us leave the underworld of human reason and breathe the living air of Divinity. He has retraced our steps. Let us follow Him back.
Posted by stephanie at March 4, 2004 08:03 PM | TrackBack(Psalms 33:8 NAS) Let all the earth fear the LORD; Let all the inhabitants of the world stand in awe of Him.
I'm struggling to say this without sounding like this post isn't exactly what I struggle with too. In fact, it is my tendency to "descend" constantly. This verse is the key for me, the Bread that I follow out of introspection; and there are many verses like them.
You may have heard it many times.
"Stand in awe of Him." That means stop. You have to stop what you are doing, where you are going, what you are thinking. To be standing is to be still. To be in awe is to revere Him. And when you see Him. And you see His mighty works (Psalm 33), you will break free from the cages we enter willingly. To see Him is to see the Truth.
I think the book of Job is one of the best answers to life in general. We as human beings want to know why we do the things we do or what the meaning of life is...actually, there are all sorts of questions we have for ourselves. Job asked God why. But God's answer was spectacular, He never answered why. He answered about Himself. And Job, when He saw the greatness of the LORD, knew that his only response was repentance and worship.
"Stand in awe of Him." I need to do this daily. To stop. And see the King. When we really see Him, we will have the right response to Him.
Finally, the Lord knows us. And He doesn't forsake us, even when we have lost ourselves in ourselves.
(Psalms 103:13-18 NAS) Just as a father has compassion on his children, So the LORD has compassion on those who fear Him. (14) For He Himself knows our frame; He is mindful that we are but dust. (15) As for man, his days are like grass; As a flower of the field, so he flourishes. (16) When the wind has passed over it, it is no more, And its place acknowledges it no longer. (17) But the lovingkindness of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him, And His righteousness to children's children, (18) To those who keep His covenant And remember His precepts to do them.
Posted by: james micah at March 4, 2004 09:29 PMthank you, jbo.
i was hoping/praying that this would be enough to spark some Bible-focused discussion on our all-too common weakness.
that's why i didn't put in all the Bible refs (in case you were wondering).
My favorite verse about introspection is (Proverbs 18:2 NASB) "A fool does not delight in understanding, but only in revealing his own mind."
Posted by: Lolly at March 5, 2004 09:27 AMi don't know. still thinking.
for a [Christian] communicator, sometimes not-communicating can be an act of disobedience in and of itself.
sometimes, however, not-communicating is just a symptom, or even the natural off-leavings of a problem which may or may not be sinful.
when non-communication fits into this second category of "indicator," the problem indeed may be disobedience/sin in some form (e.g., reacting against a God-given circumstance, deliberately shirking responsibility, giving in to fear, posturing oneself in pride, etc.). but i also think the problem could be a trial that someone is undergoing, or a particular time in one's life where God's agenda does not permit that communication be a priority.
proposition:
perhaps non-communication can, in certain seasons for certain purposes, be a positive act of faith/obedience, rather than simply a negative act of neglect and selfishness.
for those of us who eat/sleep/breathe metaphors and walk down the sidewalk in step with metrical experiments that no one else seems to hear, for those of us who find it easy to blurt out our minds on any topic, for those of us who thrive on being in the know, for those of us who live on allusions and revel in the realm of creativity -- a refraining for a time (as long as we're not just trying to garner attention to the act of refraining, and as long as it doesn't defraud others) might actually be in order. there is a designated allowance for "fasting" when appropriate for the sake of focus and spiritual readjustment.
even if it isn't a spiritual issue. i think there are some legitimate reasons to bow out of the melee for a while. for instance, if you're running on empty and just conjuring up "something to blog" for the sake of having something to say...does that mentality do justice to true communication? is that mentality capable of [authentically] out-putting anything but vanity?
all that being said, i do agree essentially with what you're saying. in other words, i agree that often what we want to call "introspection" (because it sounds noble and spiritual and deep) is actually just a self-filled cave-in, a crummy excuse for abdication.
Posted by: joy at March 5, 2004 03:49 PMI had another long comment written out especially in relation to what Joy has said, but I am rethinking it. I am a little confused, in fact.
Joy how are you relating "non-communication" to the introspection Steph is talking about? To me it seems like we are talking about two things with a few common traits. I'll keeping thinking about (and rereading) what you said.
Posted by: james micah at March 5, 2004 08:18 PMif i may throw my two pence in...
i agree with everything you've said joy.
but i also think
like jbo said
that i'm thinking of something else when i say "introspection"
non-communication is definitely healthy and definitely necessary at times.
but not the emotional, mental cave-in we call "introspection" and other things.
just thought it would help to clarify what i was trying to say. i would like to hear more about the non-communication thing, though.
Posted by: stephanie at March 5, 2004 08:28 PMthink i'm meshing on/offline conversations.
got it now. :)
see ya monday.
I'd like to think of it as an indulgence.
Healthy introspection manifests itself naturally.
It's not contrived. It's pure meditation, with God at the center.
All of us know the other variant. It involves figuring out issues on our own, tacking on a stoic facade, causing everyone to wonder about you. Justifying your life through a battle you don't need to fight, essentially.
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